Peter Lumpkins Negotiates the Calvinist Whitewater Fallacy Gorge

Peter Lumpkins made my day with one of his comments on his site. It is worth saving and keeping for a rainy day.

... I have to tell you, the swelling community of neo-Calvinists who "look smart" by citing logical fallacies, the definitions of which, they more than likely learned not from university logicians in basic philosophy classes.  Instead, they read the quicknotes from wikepedia and assume they can then bead the bullseye on every logical fallacy-formal or informal--that's ever been recorded:

Calvinist:  You "equivocated"!

Peter:  Uh?

Calvinist: You also have a "genetic fallacy"!

Peter:  Is this a disease? Is it serious?

Calvinist: Can't you make a clear statement without committing a "Not a true Scotsman fallacy"?

Peter: I'm from West Georgia

Calvinist: "Red Herring"!

Peter:  I prefer catfish—fried…

Calvinist: Yeah, right.  "Weak analogy"!

Peter: But…

Calvinist: "Straw Man"!

Peter: I was just going to say,…

Calvinist:  "Subjectivist fallacy!" Scripture alone!

Peter: Don't you think you're going a little too far?

Calvinist: "Complex question"!

Peter: Now, hold on a minute, I'd like to…

Calvinist: "Ad Hominem." Personal attack!

Peter: Perhaps others could assist us in coming to an agreement

Calvinist: "Bandwagon fallacy"!

Peter: But isn't our getting along worth it?

Calvinist: Nope. "Gambler's fallacy!"

Peter: Look. Other Calvinists are…

Calvinist: "Hasty Generalization!"

Peter: Generalization or not, I

Calvinist: "Begging the question!"

Peter: Maybe if we pray for…

Calvinist: "Appeal to authority"!